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Gospel: Matthew 18: 15-20
Jesus said to his disciples:
“If your brother sins against you,
go and tell him his fault between you and him alone.
If he listens to you, you have won over your brother.
If he does not listen,
take one or two others along with you,
so that ‘every fact may be established
on the testimony of two or three witnesses.’
If he refuses to listen to them, tell the church.
If he refuses to listen even to the church,
then treat him as you would a Gentile or a tax collector.
Amen, I say to you,
whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven,
and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.
Again, amen, I say to you,
if two of you agree on earth
about anything for which they are to pray,
it shall be granted to them by my heavenly Father.
For where two or three are gathered together in my name,
there am I in the midst of them.”
The Gospel of the Lord.
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What are four words that can make a person cringe?
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“We need to talk.”
Imagine coming home from a stressful day at school or work. Suddenly, you’re surrounded by close family members and friends.
“What’s up?” you wonder.
Feeling everyone’s eyes gazing upon you, you hear those four loaded words: “We need to talk.”
Oh boy.
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I don’t like personal conflict. I try avoiding it when possible.
But when someone says, “We need to talk,” it means something’s wrong. Something happened. And someone has to change.
Some of us would rather hold things in; suck it up and keep the peace, rather than speak the truth. But Jesus reminds us in today’s Gospel that isn’t always possible.
It’s not a matter of if – but when – these conversations happen.
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For example, parents cannot be silent if they see their child becoming depressed, running with the wrong crowds, or slipping into an addiction. It affects the entire family.
So, they intervene for the sake of their child’s health, future, and the wellbeing of the family.
Perhaps a “we need to talk” moment happened in your marriage, at work with a colleague, or even within our own parish community.
Pointing out the harm another person is causing is not meant to shame them. It’s an opportunity for a person to change; to be healed; to start anew. Because negative behavior not only affects the person causing it, but also everyone around them.
We even see these types of crucial conversations happening between Jesus and his disciples.
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Remember last week’s Gospel.
After telling Peter and the other disciples that he’s going up to Jerusalem where he’ll be crucified, Peter tries changing Jesus’ mind.
“God forbid, Lord! No such thing shall ever happen to you!” Peter said. Something tells me Peter not only feared losing his Lord, but also his own life.
Immediately, Jesus rebukes him, saying, “Get behind me, Satan! … You are thinking not as God does but as human beings do.”
Peter was out of line and Jesus held him accountable. But Christ’s command to, “get behind” him was not an invitation for Peter to leave; Jesus rebuked Peter because he loved him – and wanted their relationship to continue on healthy terms.
So, Peter humbly accepts the rebuke and the two are reconciled as they continue their journey to Jerusalem.
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Shortly thereafter, Jesus will have another crucial conversation with Peter.
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During his final night on earth, while praying in the Garden of Gethsemane with his disciples, Jesus is arrested and led off to be crucified, just as he warned them he would be.
Peter follows at a distance, and when asked by the crowds if he knows Jesus, he denies him three times saying, “I do not know him!”
Imagine how afraid Peter must’ve felt. His Master was in chains!
As Jesus is being led off into the darkness, he glances back at Peter with that look, “We need to talk.”
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After his death and resurrection, Jesus appears to Peter as an act of mercy.
If Peter is to become the “rock” of the Church, then he must repent and be reconciled with Jesus. Only then can Peter lead the Church in Christ’s name.
So, Jesus asks him one question. It’s all he needs to know: “Peter, do you love me?”
“Lord, you know everything,” he says. “You know that I love you.”
Enough said. Conflict resolved. Relationship restored.
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So, what might this mean for us?
Like Peter, sometimes we make mistakes. We say things we don’t mean. We do things that cause harm, not only to ourselves, but also to people we love.
Instead of letting these things fester in our hearts, the Lord urges us to address them for the sake of reconciliation, assuring us that these conversations can be fruitful when spoken out of love.
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Like Jesus, do I need to have a crucial conversation with someone? Or, like Peter, do I need to listen and repent?
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Sometimes, “we need to talk.”
And when we do, remember what the Lord says today. “Wherever two or three are gathered in my name, I am there in the midst of them.”
We call upon Jesus, who seeks to reconcile all things, guiding our feet into the way of peace.
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Image credits: (1) Adobe Stock (2) Bible.com (3) Encourageyourspouse.com