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One of the best-known columnists in America today is David Brooks. He’s written several insightful books on character and morals, his most recent being, “The Second Mountain.”
Last week I searched for it on Amazon and after pushing that button, “Buy now with one click,” it arrived safely at my door on Monday morning.
Brooks’ basic point is that there are two mountains that any person can climb.
The first is quite obvious – it’s the mountain of success.
Get out of school, start a career, and climb the company ladder. Accomplish all those things that our society deems important.
But countless studies have shown that when we get to the top of that first mountain and look around, the view is ultimately, even surprisingly…unsatisfying.
While it’s important to succeed – it’s important to put bread on the table – if we place all of our eggs in that one basket, then we’ll never be happy.
Deep down, we know we were made for something more.
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Enter the second mountain.
Elsewhere, Brooks calls this the “eulogy mountain.” What will people say about us when we die?
They won’t consider the car we drove or the suits we wore.
They’ll ask whether or not we led a meaningful life – were we faithful in our marriage – was I faithful as a priest? Were we a reliable friend? Did we bear other people’s burdens? Did we see God in our neighbor?
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In the Gospel Jesus tells us, “Love one another the way that I have loved you.” You might say, he’s moving our attention towards that second mountain.
It’s the only mountain Jesus ever climbed.
He never accumulated wealth, status, or property. He was only concerned about showing us how to love.
But his example can be incredibly difficult to follow.
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For example, if we examine some of our deepest relationships, we may find there’s still an element of fear or selfishness at work. Often – perhaps unconsciously – we ask ourselves, “What am I going to get out of this relationship?”
We consider the happiness that we will receive if such a relationship works… Or, conversely, the loneliness we may suffer if such a relationship ends.
At the bottom of many relationships, then, we may find ourselves – not the face of another.
On some level that’s natural. But it’s not how Jesus commands us to love.
“Love one another the way that I have loved you.” In other words, do not think about what you can take from someone else; rather, focus on what you can give.
That’s how Jesus spent his life. He was total gift.
“But he was God!” you may be thinking. Yes. But he was also fully human.
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Like Jesus, how much of myself do I give away? And how much do I keep? How much of me is hiding behind a wall?
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If that’s not already deep or challenging enough, let’s take it just one step further.
Christ teaches us that love doesn’t always lead to instant happiness. Sometimes it’s quite painful.
For Jesus that meant carrying a cross and bearing our sins… But for us?
Love may demand that we accompany our spouse through an addiction … or journey with a friend who’s battling cancer.
Love may urge us to give someone a second chance, or to accept a family member for who they are – not who we want them to be.
Love is not blind; it sees clearly. It accepts people’s strengths, weaknesses, their quirks and all.
That’s the way Jesus loves us – just as we are – and it’s how we should love one another, without an ounce of judgment.
Who is one person in my life that can I love a little better – whether it’s my spouse, a friend, or even someone I don’t love at all?
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Love can be thrilling … and, at times, exceptionally painful. But the more we climb that second mountain the happier we become, because love is what gives our lives meaning.
As Saint Paul says, “If I do not have love I have nothing … I am nothing.”