Fr Kevin Kilgore

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“Amen, I say to you, whoever does not accept the kingdom of God like a child will not enter it” (Mark 10:15).

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Have you ever seen a newborn child?

It’s amazing how utterly dependent babies are upon their parents for life, love, food and shelter.

But as soon as they reach the “terrible two’s,” children start thinking on their own. Even before the age of reason, they know that that toy is “mine,” not yours!

It’s the beginning of a child’s independence.

Any parent can tell you that independent streak only strengthens as children become teenagers.

And as we become adults our independence – or self-reliance – becomes even stronger.

For example, how many of us hate asking for help?

Or how many of us try shouldering life’s burdens alone?

Like a child with its toy, we say this is my problem, my stress, or even my life, not yours.

We celebrate that independent attitude Frank Sinatra sang about, “I did it my way.”

It’s a behavior we started learning as children.

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Today’s Gospel addresses that independent streak within us – a streak that may not be so healthy after all.

Jesus tells us plainly we must approach him like a newborn child, not like a strong, self-reliant adult.

If we do, then he’ll grant us the grace (you might say the milk) we need to grow stronger.

Away, then, with the self-reliant, “my way” attitude.

Whatever our prayers, our burdens, our sins or desires may be, they are not “ours.”

They belong to Jesus.

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Many of us remember the story of Pinocchio, the adorable wooden doll who could never tell the truth. Each time he lied, his nose grew bigger.

In fact, it grew so much it appeared three feet long!

Now imagine Pinocchio standing before us today, saying, “Boy, some of your noses are an inch too long. You may want to consider plastic surgery. But no worries, I know a guy.”

Meanwhile, his is three feet!

Can you sense the irony?

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If our nose grew like Pinocchio’s every time we lied, judged, or gossiped about someone else, how long would our nose be?

Would we feel comfortable when leaving the church?

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This is Jesus’ point in the Gospel: Stop judging others. Look in the mirror, instead.

Or, as he says, “Why do you notice the splinter in your brother’s eye, but do not perceive the wooden beam in your own?”

It’s a very challenging point. But we can be quick to notice the faults and failures of others, without considering our own.

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In three days we will celebrate Ash Wednesday, the truth that we are dust and unto dust we shall return.

We return to dust because of our sins.

As Saint Paul says, “All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23).

During this season of Lent, then, the Lord invites us to look in the mirror and admit our own imperfections.

Or, using the imagery of Pinocchio, to consider how long our nose has become.

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For example, how many of us have seen a post on Facebook meant to target and shame someone because of their race, religion, orientation, or politics?

And how many of us have laughed, liked, or even shared those images with others?

If Jesus  held us accountable for everything we’ve said or posted on social media, would there be things we’d want to delete?

Just because we disagree with someone does not mean that we should make fun of them.

Just last week Jesus commanded us to, “Love our enemies and pray for those who persecute us.”

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This type of negative behavior even affects children.

They know who’s the smartest, the prettiest, the fastest, the coolest, the wealthiest, and the most popular.

And, equally, they know who is not.

Think of how often some children are bullied – judged – for being different. It hurts, it’s unfair, and it is not Christian.

“Stop judging,’ Jesus warns us,“so you will not be judged.”

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Or think about that person whom we’ve labeled as the “black sheep” in our family.

Though this person may struggle with mental health, addiction, or a series of poor choices, how much time have we spent listening, praying, or encouraging them?

Have we reached out in any way?

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The Gospel isn’t intended to shame us or make our lives difficult.

But it is meant to humble us, and challenge us to uproot those unhealthy behaviors in our lives – behaviors, which do not make us happy, and do not make the world a better place.

“I have come that you may have life,” Jesus says, “and have it in abundance.” 

We can only live life to the fullest when our hearts are free from sin, judgment, and hatred of any kind.

So where am I not bearing fruit in my life? What are the sins or behaviors that I need to stop?

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Some people around us may have a nose as long as Pinocchio’s.

But we may, too.

And that’s where our focus should be this Lent – ourselves, because the best cure for judgment is often a mirror.

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“The pharisees approached him and said, ‘Is it lawful for a husband to divorce his wife?’ They were testing him.” (Mark 10:2).

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What Jesus condemns above all else is a hardened heart, someone who’s not open to his mercy.

The Pharisees were hardened.

They never really wanted to follow Jesus; they only wanted to test him, to push his buttons.

And in this particular case, they’re looking for an excuse to abandon their wives, because they’re selfish.

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Obviously, God wants every marriage to be fruitful, and last forever.

But if we find ourselves caught in a difficult situation – if we are struggling in our marriage, or if it’s ended in heartbreak – the arms of Christ are still open to us.

The question is, “Are we still open to him?”

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To be open to Jesus means our heart is not hardened like the Pharisees.

Rather, we make the daily effort to forgive, and to live as men and women of good will, who do not wish evil upon our neighbors, even when they hurt or abandon us.

As Christians the call is clear: love your God, love your neighbor, and love your enemies.

How will we see beyond ourselves and love our neighbors today?